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- Who not how
Welcome to all of you who have joined in the past few weeks. If you’re opening this for the first time, or you’re just coming back from adult summer camp - I write weekly on insights and tactics around cultivating connections with your clients, collaborators, and community.
“I feel I change my mind all the time. And I sort of feel that's your responsibility as a person, as a human being – to constantly be updating your positions on as many things as possible. And if you don't contradict yourself on a regular basis, then you're not thinking.” - Malcolm Gladwell
Eight years ago, we discovered a truth: Creating a strategy around how professional relationships are cultivated wasn't just good marketing—it was our lifeline. That body of work, the centerpiece of my 2019 book, has been the seed of multiple ventures since.
Today, I share an evolution in my thinking. This goes beyond nurturing relationships.
One pillar is Consistency. So important that it grabbed the first letter in the CAPITAL strategy. Without it, what use is a well-maintained contact list if it's never revisited? We'd witness bursts of commitment, usually around New Year's 🍾, followed by dwindling effort. How strong is a relationship that you reconnect with them only once, then ghost?
We tried everything: time blocking, distraction management, habit loops. But important tasks would always be overshadowed by urgent ones.
Except for one concept, which has completely reshaped my current ventures.
It's about who, not how.
Taking Action
If you are struggling to maintain consistency - especially with a task that can’t be fully outsourced or automated - here are a few of my own solutions.
In my thrice-weekly meetings with my executive assistant, she asks: “Who have you met recently? What's our next move?”
For three years, my accountability coach, every Friday, would ask if I'd updated my CRM and made a new connection.
To tackle random tasks, I use Flow Club (click for an extended free trial; full disclosure: I'm a proud investor).
Our GoodSphere offering is now focused on a "SoulCycle for your Sphere" program. Once you learn our framework, we host multiple guided sessions every week.
Worried about the cost? Consider the priceless value of nurtured relationships versus these manageable investments.
Remember: You might work for yourself, but you don't have to do it all alone.
Further Reading
If the “Who not how” theory intrigues you, the book will too.
What did you think of The Sphere this week? |