the secret social club (and why you're already a member)

I write weekly about the strategies, habits, and tactics around cultivating the connections that matter to you.

I still remember my first "real" business conference. There I was, clutching my sad water cup like it was a protective shield, watching in dismay as others seemed to float effortlessly from conversation to conversation. You know the type - making introductions, sharing laughs, exchanging business cards like they were Magic cards (dating myself here). Meanwhile, I was trying to look busy checking my Blackberry, which mostly involved refreshing my empty inbox every 30 seconds.

Something had to be wrong with me, right?

Fast forward a decade, several companies, and approximately 3,427 coffee meetings later, I've learned something important: Some people are born with the "people gene," but many – if not most – don’t. Of that second group, I’ve seen many master the game like any other skill, like riding a bike or making the perfect omelet.

Case in point: Of the many people I know - myself included - who host dinners on a regular basis, the majority admit to being introverted. They put the time and effort into hosting because it’s a social situation they get to be in control over.

Here's the thing: Whether building relationships comes naturally to you or feels about as comfortable as wearing shoes on the wrong feet, there's room for growth. And it starts with awareness.

If you're in the "this doesn't come naturally" camp, first realize you're not alone. That person "working the room" might be dying inside or might have spent years honing their approach. More importantly, you don't have to mimic their style. Maybe you're better at focused 1:1 conversations over coffee than crowd-surfing a packed happy hour. That's perfectly fine – in fact, it's better than fine, it's your superpower.

For those of you who find schmoozing as natural as breathing, there's still work to be done. Sometimes overconfidence can blind us to areas where we could improve or help us miss signals from others who might not be as comfortable.

The key for both groups? Awareness yields transformation. Start paying attention to:

• What situations energize you vs. drain you

• How others respond to your approach

• What (supposedly) successful networkers do that you could adapt to your style

• Where your own biases or assumptions might be holding you back

Whether you're a natural social butterfly or more of a networking newbie, keep reading. We've got plenty more to discuss about building authentic relationships that matter.

Until next week,

-Zvi

On YouTube: Want a Stronger Network? My 15 Minute Routine

Networking doesn’t have to be complicated! In this video, I’ll show you a super simple 15-minute routine that keeps your connections strong without feeling like a chore. Trust me, most people overthink this—let’s make it easy!

TOpICS COVERED:

• What “networking” really means (and why it matters)

• The biggest mistake people make when trying to grow their network

• A simple, stress-free routine to stay connected in just 15 minutes

• Five easy actions you can do today to strengthen your relationships

• Why rewarding yourself is the secret to making networking a habit

You can see all my videos and interviews on my channel! If you find these helpful, I’d appreciate a like, subscribe, and share with a friend, colleague, or enemy.

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