How to Invest In A Budding Relationship

Happy Tuesday to all of you! If you’re taking the time to read this, mind telling us how we’re doing? If you have any topics you think we should cover, just hit that reply button in your inbox. And as always, the best gift is sharing this with someone you love… or hate, we’re not picky.

Jenn randomly met Elizabeth at a mastermind dinner and they instantly hit it off.

They bonded over their trips to Perú, their love for breathwork, and their shared experiences raising kids while growing a business.

After the event was over, Jenn gave Elizabeth a hug and exchanged emails. Everything’s going great, right?

They never spoke again.

Ok, I’m being a bit dramatic.

Jenn wasn’t malicious. She simply didn’t know what to do next to invest in their budding relationship.

All these questions loomed in her head:

• Would it be weird to ask her if she’d want to grab coffee?

• Would it be too soon to add her on Facebook or LinkedIn?

• How has Tom Cruise not aged in the 36 years since the original Top Gun?

• Should I send her an e-mail? What would I even put on there?

While Modern Family Jenn would be much more adept with these situations (go realtors!), our Jenn needed more guidance on what to do.

Here’s what we recommend to Jenn (and you!) to build stronger relationships with the people we just met.

Record notes

After their interaction, Jenn should write down as many notes as she can remember about Elizabeth.

• Business

• Hobbies

• Family

• Shared commonalities

• Special interests

Jenn can do so in their personal CRM (like Relatable!) or wherever they organize their contacts. If she’s interested in building a deeper relationship with Elizabeth, she must prioritize them in her CRM. A good database of relationships should not only store the details on who you know, but also help you determine who you should be investing more time with.

Follow up and follow through

Send a quick note to thank them. This first gesture sounds so simple, but a surprising number of people don’t do this.

Yes, she can definitely follow them on social media (if Elon hasn’t deplatformed them yet…).

However, to be in the top percentage of people with strong networks, one must learn the concept of following through.

Chris Fralic, a super connector and prolific venture capitalist, shared in First Round Review that following through is “actually doing what you say you’re going to do.”

I know, it’s wild how not dropping the ball puts you in the upper echelons.

Here’s a story to beautifully illustrate Chris’ point.

“I recently met with Kenny Herman, who used to work for a First Round company and is one of the best business development people out there. In a meeting, he kept coming up with ideas for people to introduce me to and said he’d send over a list that I could choose from.

Afterwards, he actually did send me an email with LinkedIn links to all of the people he’d brainstormed and one-line details on who they were. With it came a short note offering to make introductions. That's the perfect follow up. Nine out of 10 people don't do that. Instead, most people just drop off or forget. Not only does the relationship stop there, but I’ll never use the word reliable to describe them.”

Follow up some time later, again, to express your thanks

This can look like,

“Hey Elizabeth, thank you again for your book recommendation of Breath. I just finished it last week and loved the story. I knew how bad mouth breathing was but I didn’t realize how dangerous it actually is. I started becoming more conscious of breathing through my nose and in only a few days, I’ve felt much lighter and calmer than before. Thank you again for sharing this book with me!!”

A message like this not only gives another touchpoint. It also shows that you’ve listened to what they’ve said and have a genuine appreciation for their recommendation.

The great part about gratitude is that it never goes away, so you can always thank someone, over and over, years later.

Set a reminder to re-engage in the future

Life can get busy. With work, family, health, and more weighing on the minds of professionals everywhere, it’s natural to sometimes lose touch with the people we care about.

Knowing this about our human nature, we can do our best to remind ourselves to stay connected.

In your CRM, set a reminder for some time in the future–monthly, quarterly, annually–to re-engage with those who you want to stay close with.

Once you get those notifications, you can easily send them a message to see how they’re doing. Yes that’s right–every interaction doesn’t have to be an in-depth email.

You can consider a simple “hey, just thinking of you!” message.

Or for the yearly reminder, you can send a photo of where you both met a year ago to the anniversary of your friendship with a short note.

“I can’t believe we met a year ago at [event]. Time flies!! Hope you’re well.”

Now Jenn is adequately prepared to take action. Don’t be afraid to send Elizabeth a follow-up email. Follow her on social media if you both use it. Ask her to grab coffee together if you’re feeling up for it!

But also remember to follow through and consistently re-engage. Recording notes and setting reminders in your CRM will help her stay on track.

We have a lot more about effectively re-engaging on the queue.

If you have any questions, just let us know. Good luck! ✌️